It has been awhile friends. I am not going to apologize for my absence. I am not going to apologize for not being on top of my writing.
Originally, this blog was a place for me to come and vent my feelings or thoughts that I didn’t feel comfortable admitting or speaking aloud. I came here to find solace and while I found that, I also found people who identified with me. This reminder that I am not alone runs so deep and affects me in great ways and encourages me to push forward.
At some point, I tried to make this blog more than it was. I wanted lots of followers and I wanted to be heard so desperately by so many, but I forgot that that wasn’t the point. I don’t care how many people read my words or express their responses; I would still be excited to write whether my words affected one person, a hundred people, or just me.
I feel that I have lost my oomph and my passion by making writing on here a chore and something I have to do instead of something I look forward to doing. This isn’t a job and it is not a requirement, so I need to regroup and adjust my sails.
Instead of my goal being to write everyday, I am changing it to writing when I genuinely have something to say, when the words are clawing their way out as opposed to dragging them out kicking and screaming just to keep up appearances. I may disappear for while, I may post on a regular basis. I don’t know yet, but I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep and expectations that will only stress me out.
This is my place to go and it is for me. So please stick around and don’t give up on me. I enjoy speaking to all of you and it brings a smile on my face every time I get feedback of any kind, but I just need a little time to decipher what is really going on inside my head.
❤ a girl