I am positive that every single person has been told this phrase. Maybe you have been the one to give this advice. Let me be clear: faking it till you make it is bullshit! I hate this phrase more than I hate being told to be yourself. It is nonsense and awful and I never want to hear it again.
Fake It Till You Make It… to me that is encouragement to lie to myself and those around me. How is lying about how I feel and what I think going to help me “make it”? In my experience, this kind of behavior just helps dig a deeper hole into loneliness and hopelessness. If no one knows how you feel because you put on a happy face when you are really dying inside, how will you get help, how will you succeed, how will you get better?
I understand that in situations that make you feel uncomfortable, you need to push through for perhaps a friend or a family member. So I think that it is very important that we be careful when we give this advice. It definitely depends on the situation whether this is good advice or not.
It is a completely different story to tell someone to keep their head up and their thoughts positive. It might be one of those easier-said-than-done type of thing, but at least it is a real encouragement. I believe you can keep your head up while still being honest and open about how you feel inside. You can be a strong person who is struggling.
Maybe it is just the word ‘fake’ or ‘faking’ that I just don’t like. It has such a negative connotation. I don’t want to be fake in any form whether it is just to keep up a specific appearance. That is exactly what I stand against. I have always been an advocate for saying exactly what you think and being exactly how you feel. Being fake (even for the benefit of yourself) isn’t healthy. I think it would be better to be out and about while being vocal or open about not wanting to be… that is a good start in my eyes, because then at least your friends and family know where you stand and how you are instead of thinking you are “better” or happy because that is the face that you put on.
Why can’t we just take off our masks and be real with each other? Then it wouldn’t be so taboo to see people showing different emotions and we wouldn’t feel so alone in ours.
❤ a girl