The Ball is in His Court

For my sake, let’s pretend this is a hypothetical situation.

So this weekend happened. It was weird, confusing, and emotional. The clouds are starting to clear, but yesterday was still pretty foggy and I was still pretty hurt. I took it upon myself to give myself some more power in the situation. (Hint: I don’t let people go very easily, especially if I care!)

So needless to say my mind is a house that got sucked into a tornado. I haven’t been able to sleep or think straight or be calm. I ended up skipping my last two classes yesterday and grabbed lunch and studied with a close friend instead. I decided to create three cards labeled Option 1, Option 2, and Option 3.

He and I had discussed Option 1 and Option 2. I use the term discussed very loosely. We had a “breakup” conversation three times and each one had a different conclusion, so I am unsure where I stand currently. So these option cards were intended to make it clear to him what I see our options being and what each one means to me.

Option 1: Stay together, but take things slow. He feels he needs more time to focus on school and work, so we would only spend time together on the weekends while just talking on the phone and texting during the week. Open communication and being honest about how we feel about everything; no secrets. Making an effort to show the other that they care in anyway they deem fit. Show affection, because attraction is not something to be ashamed of. Meet each other halfway; 50 from me and 50 from him… understand that we are both messy humans and we can’t be perfect.

Option 2: Breakup, but stay friends. This would have to come with more boundaries. Of course we will spend time together, but not so much expectation. No touching though besides hugs, because I happen to be extremely attracted to him and vice versa, so that could get messy. No jealousy; if he picks this I will be single, so he cannot lay claim to me. I am not on hold for him; it will be my choice if I choose to wait for him to get his shit together.

Option 3: Breakup, and not be friends. This is what it sounds like. Minimal communication. No planned hangouts, only accidental stuff when we both happen to be at the same event or something. No touching. No jealousy. [This really isn’t in the running…]

So anyhow I gave them to him last night around 5pm and I still haven’t heard anything, but I am calmer than I have been in awhile. I actually drove over there earlier to nicely demand an answer, but he wasn’t home, so now I have to give him more time to think. It sounds ridiculous, but he really does have a lot going on and a lot to think about, so I don’t hate him for trying. Picking between a sweet girl and everything else can be hard, so I have so much respect for him.

I’ll keep y’all posted on this hypothetical situation!

❤ Lauren