Hot ‘N Cold

My emotions are a constant rollercoaster.

One day I am ready to forgive everyone and be the best damn person I can be. The next day I am losing my mind and crying entire lakes. The day after that I am radiating positivity and wanting to help everyone. The next day I am wallowing and feigning sickness to avoid life.

I literally just want to sleep and cry… occasionally eat. I don’t want to be with people yet being alone seems so scary. I’m being hurt by good friends and I feel like I am drowning with all my schoolwork. I loathe my internship, but feel guilty about it, because they are so nice to me. I just wish I could figure my life out.

Sometimes I wish I could just turn my emotions off. I am always so high or so low; I desperately want to find an in-between! I feel like I am drowning and can’t keep my head above water. I need more time in the day!

I’ll keep paddling, but beware I am getting awfully tired.

❀ Lauren

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6 thoughts on “Hot ‘N Cold

  1. I have those days, too, and sometimes it can be a struggle. Just know that better things are coming. Sometimes life gets all scattered, but you are strong enough to make it through. You can do this!

    Liked by 1 person

      • I used to feel like that my sophomore year, the first semester I was living on campus. I was miserable, and I was considering going back to commuting second semester. I saw the worst in myself and I didn’t have good people in my life. But I got involved on campus and was able to find new people and new experiences. I know it’s hard to believe, but things always work out. I never believed it either, but I’m starting to.

        Liked by 1 person

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