It’s been too long. We all know my track record for being a steady writer is next to none, but today I write to you with no goals or plans, but just a simple need.
I always disappear for different reasons. Sometimes it is to prove to others that I am not a monster and can live and think without displaying it on here. Other times it is to show myself that I am not addicted to blogging. Occasionally it is just because life gets busy.
So often we do things to prove something, to make a statement, to be amazing, but what would happen if we just did something, because we wanted to with no ulterior motives. Today, I write to you with no ulterior motives. Today, I write to you with no promises of a future, no goals for likes or views, no plans to start writing regularly. Today, I write to you simply because I wanted to.
I would be lying if I said I don’t think about blogging or remember how it felt to thrive behind this screen. I would be lying if I didn’t admit how I miss the people, the free speech, and the anonymity. I would be lying if I didn’t dream of jumping back into all of it, but I would also be lying if I didn’t express the toll having this site took on me. I remember the heartache, the harsh words, the friendships lost, and the tears shed. I remember feeling all the weight come off my shoulders as I submitted a post and then feeling all the bricks weigh me back down as someone revealed how much they disagreed with me.
I think to myself about what this blog was supposed to be about. I try and recall why I originally created it. I wonder if I can bring it full circle and find that grand idea again. The truth is that I can’t give it up no matter how hard I try or don’t try, it sticks with me.
So thank you to everyone who has supported me, encouraged me, and/or challenged me. All my time spent here would have been nothing without you. I am so grateful to have met all of you! This is not goodbye my friends, just a sweet thank you from a dear friend. ❤